These are only a few words you could use to describe the incredible war correspondent, Marie Colvin. But words would not do her justice.
In Extremis: The Life and Death of the War Correspondent Marie Colvin.
The first thing that drew me to this book was the cover. A woman with an eye patch. There had to be a story there. Attractive. Confident. Extreme.
In Extremis is about a war correspondent who lived to be a voice for those who were not heard. Travelling to parts of the world where few were brave enough to venture. Afghanistan. Libya. East Timor. Kosovo. Syria. There was no place that was too dangeorus. No place that she feared.
She was a drinker and smoker, but her drug of choice was the danger zone. To be with the people, on the ground, telling their stories selflessly even when bombs were going off around her.
It’s impossible to know or even to guess what goes on in a mind that has witnessed the terrors of war. It’s hard to imagine it all in the comforts of our living room watching Netflix and sipping on wine as our kids sleep soundly in their beds.
From the humble beginnings of a middle class family, to a passionate and brave woman who trusted that her reporting as a war correspondent was necessary to not only inform the world but also help those in need. Her words and her dedication saved many lives.
In Extremis is rich in colour and emotion, leaving no stone unturned bewteen Colvin’s messy private life and career, written by her friend and colleague, it draws on interviews with family and friends, journal entries, published stories and email correspondence. Together telling a story of an inspiring woman, acclaimed journalist, taken too soon doing what she loved most. Marie Colvin was a war correspondent who refused to settle behind a desk. Her place was in the war zone and that’s where it all ended.
Her death could have been avoided, maybe only postponed. One will never know. But her selflessness will live on.
You never know when inspiration is going to hit and waiting for it is like suicide for your writing career. Inspiration strikes are like shooting stars. They don’t come around nearly as often as we’d like.
Revelations are similar. You can’t just ask for a revelation to take place. It often hits when you least expect it.
Like this weekend for example. The family and I planned a weekend getaway. Thinking that it was going to be a warm day (it’s the middle of a Queensland spring after all) we booked our favourite beachside spot weeks ago. I had great plans for lounging by the pool, working on the tan, reading, and writing my book.
Hmm. Turned out to be the coldest and wettest weekend in months. I don’t remember winter being this cold. Perfect for writing indoors by a cosy fire but not exactly ideal conditions for our weekend plans of being around the pool.
Shit happens.
Try keeping a five-year old entertained after they’ve been told that swimming and bike riding is off the menu.
Between ping-pong, the local tavern indoor playground and watching three hours of the Avengers: Endgame movie (I cried!), we somehow managed and by the afternoon the rain subsided and my son and husband went out to play outside while I got an hour to write.
Then my brain froze.
Yep. I had an hour or so of free writing time and I couldn’t write at all. WTF.
Then I thought, why the pressure? I’m on a weekend away with my family. Is it really that bad if I write nothing at all?
Of course not.
Besides I did manage a quick few paragraphs of a book I’m rewriting in between breakfast and lunch. It was ten minutes but enough to have ticked the box.
And that’s the revelation, and the problem: ticking boxes.
Everything I do revolves around ticking boxes. My life feels like a never-ending to-do list.
Life is not a to-do list. Yet, so many of us revolve our lives around one. Sure it’s okay to have a list of things to do but it’s equally important to throw out the list when we go away. Let loose, go with the flow, have fun.
Writing doesn’t have to be a to-do list either, at least not with each writing session. You want some flexibility.
To-do lists have their place. In writing and in life.
But if everything in life (and writing) revolved around a to-do list, I don’t think we’d end up getting all that much done. At least not stuff that really mattered.
I know it sounds ridiculous but sometimes that daily pressure is counterproductive. Sometimes we just need to go with the flow.
Take a moment to think about your daily to-do list. How much do you actually tick off at the end of the day?
All of it? Half of it? A quarter? Barely get through a few?
Most of the time the list keeps growing as do your stress levels when shit doesn’t get done.
As writers, our job is to form sentences on a page. Put words together that make coherent sense and create a story that enthrals, entertains, inspires and at times, offends.
Sentences are powerful – both spoken and written. They can do as much good as they can do harm. Yet, quite often, we pay them little attention.
I would not call myself an expert on sentence writing. Sure, I can string a few words together, write a blog post or a book, but that by no means proves that I know what I’m doing.
There are millions more that can do it so much better.
While I’ll never be a literary genius, nor is that my aim, I do want my writing to improve, to grow stronger, so that as a result my books get better and attract a wider audience.
I don’t see a point of doing something if I don’t work towards improvement.
That’s all we can aim for as writers. It’s the only thing that we have some control over.
Joe Moran, in his book, “First You Write a Sentence”, is an expert.
The book is nothing that I expected. In fact, my initial thought was, how am I going to get through this?
Then I started with a sentence.
“First You Write a Sentence” is almost poetic. How he managed to entertain this concept for over two hundred pages is beyond my intellect. But each page was an enjoyable treat that taught me more about stringing words together than any other manual for writers I’ve come across – and I read as many as I can get my hands on.
One key idea that I got from this book was layering. Each sentence needs to layer on top of the other. A cause and effect. An action and a reaction. Words together that create poetry in the mind rather than jarring the reader from the story. As writers we should know this but he explains it beautifully that it stays with you long after you’ve stopped reading.
“A sentence is a social animal; it feeds off its fellows to form higher units of sense…sentences do not really count until they come together and turn aphoristic isolation into forward motion.” (p161).
However, be warned, not every sentence can be the magical being in your writing. There is much room for mundane sentences in every story, acting as a breather to what came before and what may come after.
It’s about striking a balance that suits the story you are telling. Sometimes that’s the hardest thing of all.
For any writer, at any level, I highly recommend picking a copy of this beautiful book. Simple, poetic, inspiring…it makes you want to pick up your pen (or laptop) and start writing.
Staring at blank page can be a terrifying thing for a writer. A moment of fear. Hesitation. Paralysis.
How many times have you sat down in front of the Macbook or a piece of paper, fingers on keyboard or pen in hand, and just stared helplessly at the crispy white page or empty screen?
Me too.
Most writers have faced the blank page with much trepidation. You aren’t the first. You won’t be the last.
But the blank page has magic and power in it. It’s filled with hope and opportunity. Dreams and stories that can be woven together like a dance on the sea shore in the moonlit sky.
The blank page. As writers we face it at the start of a new project. A new chapter. A blog post.
It’s a daily battle.
A demon we must overcome to move forward.
But there’s much beauty in the blank page, as much as there is terror.
The beauty lies in the unknown.
Like a painter creates magic with colour, we as writers add colour with our words. It’s beautiful and terrifying at the same time.
Maybe that’s why creativity is so attractive. Two sides of one coin. We choose how we perceive. We decide which side determines who we are.
It’s cold now where I sit. The sun gently warms my back in the early spring morning. She woman at the table besides me flicks through the morning paper. The barista converses with the locals. The patrons all seem to know each other. I’ve ordered a latte, my head still fuzzy from last night’s wine and degustation dinner. I’m not sure I want the coffee but sitting here without one feels odd.
Where was I? Right, the beauty of the blank page.
Facing the blank page is the beginning of an extraordinary journey with an unknown destination. Yes, that can be scary but also invigorating. We can discover where we are going just like the reader will discover as they read.
We have the power to create something from nothing.
The blank page becomes our canvas to empower, motivate, lift, educate and entertain.
There are no rules.
It’s your page. Your words. Your journey.
Fear it. Love it. Loathe it. Embrace it.
Each day in our life is like a blank page.
We can fill it with sitting on the couch binging on chips and Netflix. We can get to know our neighbours. Volunteer our time for a cause we support. Start a business. Write a book. Change a life. Or just live groundhog day.
It’s up to you.
The words are up to you too. You have a million or so at your disposal.
You decide in how you fill your page, whether that’s the one you’re sitting in front of, or the one you’re living.
Sometimes the words flow with ease. Other times they’re a slog through muddy fields.
Nothing worth having, doing, achieving, ever came easy. If it did we’d all be doing it.
The blank page is your playground.
Take the pressure off. Have fun with it.
Create something spectacular.
You only need to know the first word. The rest will come, one step at a time.
How do you feel about the blank page? Has the blank page ever stopped you from writing? How did you overcome it?
Empowerment. Why do we need to feel empowered, inspired, motivated? Why can’t we just be that way all the time? I guess it comes down to growing up and worrying about what everyone else thinks while they’re worrying about what you think. Ridiculous, isn’t it?
When you really think about it, no body really gives a damn what you do. They don’t care whether you’ve written the book, started a business, took a year off to see the world, or decided to get hitched, had six kids and joined a cult.
Okay, so family and friends might care in the form that they are happy for you. Some might even support you, others discourage you.
Either way you’re in it on your own.
Unless you’re willing to believe in yourself and chase your dreams no one is going to do it for you. Work hard, play hard, and just get the shit done.
I know, I know. It’s so much easier said than done. Especially when you’re inspired one moment and then you wake up in the morning, hit snooze a dozen times, checked Twitter, Instagram, Facebook and email three times each, and realised all those things you had to do before the day started aren’t going to happen now and you have twenty minutes to shower, dress, put on the make up, grab your lunch and be out the door to make your train for work.
So where was I? Empowerment, that’s right.
Last night, a few friends and I went to a comedy show. Or so we thought. Stand up comedy, laugh so hard that you cry.
The joke might have been on us.
Well let me tell you, we laughed – a lot, got a bit teary too. It was funny, sad, and real, and it could have been classed as a self-help seminar or a motivational session. Had we known what it was, we might not have gone.
I’m glad we went.
It was empowering and it came at exactly the right time.
As a writer and creative, I find that it’s very easy to be super critical of myself. No one can criticize me more than I criticise myself. It must come with the creative side of my brain. Nothing is ever good enough.
Sometimes it’s a self fulfilling prophecy.
Like when you publish a book and discover that there are errors in it. Lots of them. And no one bothered to tell you.
It’s embarrassing, gut wrenching and frustrating.
When it happens it’s easy to blame others. But in the end we are responsible for our successes and our failures. Yes, there are other variables involved, but in the end it’s on us. Just us.
So last night, I felt empowered. Empowered enough to admit to myself that I’m a writer. Am I good writer? Who knows. There are a million writers that are better than me. So what? There are a million other better runners than me too but that’s not going to stop me from hitting the pavement and signing up for marathons.
Good, bad, awesome, mediocre.
It doesn’t matter. That’s all subjective.
I am writer because I write. I am an author because I’ve written and published books. I can say that I’m successful to a point. I am successful until I keep raising the bar, higher and higher and higher, before I even give myself the chance to enjoy the little successes like writing a book whilst working full time and being a mum. It doesn’t matter that I’m not a best seller or that it’s not (yet) my full time job. It’s all just a different measure of success.
Putting yourself down is not empowerment. It’s discouraging and soul destroying. You wouldn’t do it to your best friend so why the hell do we do it to the person that we have to spend our entire lives with – ourselves?
A friend of mine recently told me she’s going to give less fucks, and she has a point. Why do we care so much what people think? More often than not we care about what people who we don’t care about think of us. Why oh why?
When I actually write it down it sounds ridiculous.
So, I laughed a lot last night. I felt empowered. I realised that I take life way too seriously and I’ve forgotten how to let my hair down. I’ve forgotten how to be me. The person I am is not someone I recognise.
Last night, the comedy show that was and wasn’t a comedy, opened up my eyes. How long they will stay open is anyone’s guess. But one thing is certain, that I’m a writer, and write I will. Sometimes it will be crap, sometimes it will be magical. Maybe one day my words will empower someone else.
One thing is certain, it’s up to me. Just like it is up to you to follow your dreams and to stay empowered.
Go and get what you want in life. You’re the only one who can.
The people who love you will support you, and the rest, well that’s their problem. I’m off to find my tribe.
I hope you do too. Go for it, you know you can. You know you will.
I have read at least 100 books on the craft of writing, some multiple times. I read over 50 books every year – both fiction and non fiction. I’ve written a few of my own but with each book I read or write, I feel like instead of knowing more, I realise I know very little. Maybe this is wisdom, knowing we know very little, maybe it is ignorance, or it borders on a little bit of both. One thing is certain, the only option is to keep going, keep fighting for my dream, because if I don’t, no one else will. The only obstacle in the way is my own inner voice. Do I listen to the one that screams, “Go for it!” or the one that whispers,”Stop being a fool.”
